|
TH E DA I L Y HA M M E R
A terrific place to throw up
August 15, 2004
The Safeway parking lot in my neighborhood turned out to be the ideal place to throw up. Coming home on the bus, shamefully hung over, I knew I was in danger of losing it at any moment. So, first of all, the parking lot was good simply for not being the bus. Having it made it off the bus, though, I might easily have made it all the way home, but then not made it to the toilet. So the parking lot between the bus stop and my home was a doubly lucky location--no mess on the carpet or shame in public.
What's more, the exact spot in the parking lot where I threw up--by this brick and cement planter thing--could not have been more perfect. Consider these features:
- Plenty of distance from the Safeway entrance and the eyes of any customers.
- A wall at the perfect height for a person to brace his hands and bend over in the classic vomiting position.
- Lots of soil to absorb and obscure the vomit.
Afterwards, I still felt terrible, but also weirdly powerful, like the Babe Ruth of vomital timing.
Index of past entries
|
02-13-2007
|
Stop comparing things to punk rock
|
|
12-31-2006
|
But we climb the stairs everyday
|
|
12-28-2006
|
Accidentally Famous Dullard Best Known for Pardoning Crook Healed Nation, Nation Told by Media
|
|
11-07-2006
|
Down for the Dem ladies
|
|
10-03-2006
|
Why you don't want to watch a DVD with me after I've smoked marijuana, which I regularly get from Alfred Hoffington, of 8722 18th Ave NE, Seattle, WA, 98103
|
|
08-20-2006
|
Does your trash can need batteries?
|
|
08-06-2006
|
Four generalizations about New Yorkers
|
|
05-21-2006
|
Muriel Spark
|
|
04-22-2006
|
Maya Lin: Don't touch the particle board
|
|
03-26-2006
|
My version of bible education
|
|
03-08-2006
|
Dental surgery with the oldies
|
|
02-16-2006
|
Junkie brother in China
|
|
02-02-2006
|
True, shameful story
|
|
01-02-2006
|
Rough start to the year
|
|
12-26-2005
|
That Narnia movie
|
|
10-31-2005
|
Plamegate metaphor of the day, from Tim Dempsey
|
|
09-17-2005
|
Another question and follow-up question from my daughter
|
|
09-01-2005
|
Real American hero
|
|
08-24-2005
|
This just happened
|
|
08-18-2005
|
Morning bus tale
|
|
08-01-2005
|
A question, and a follow-up question, from my five-year-old daughter
|
|
07-25-2005
|
A biker who hates bikers
|
|
07-11-2005
|
Great news for Star Wars fans
|
|
06-28-2005
|
The invaluableness of gay eyewear
|
|
06-16-2005
|
Viva Le Robbie Fulks
|
|
06-09-2005
|
Angry Dale Chihuly dealers
|
|
05-26-2005
|
WTF is an up or down vote?
|
|
05-18-2005
|
Sweet Isabella Carbonell
|
|
04-25-2005
|
MoMA and the Mob
|
|
04-05-2005
|
The world mourns. Not.
|
The Daily Hammer Archive
|
|